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Those Old Gods: Short Stories (Volume One) -- Book Description

The gods didn't retire. They unionised.

Meet Juno Verdant: seer-class, divine-adjacent, and one decision away from a disciplinary on any given Tuesday. Welcome to the Company, an oh-so-British bureaucracy that files incident reports on eldritch hazards, negotiates with divine egos, and keeps the magic-adjacent digital paperwork.

Across darkly funny tales, Juno stumbles through:


a concept that shouldn't exist (and knows exactly how to embarrass you),


a petty feud with Death over a sandwich (it escalates),


a "shortcut" through the wrong plane in a Company car (do not whisper to the dashboard), and


a surprise "parenting day" with Nature herself (flowers are spying now; please act normal)

Sharp, deadpan, and a little feral, this collection blends urban fantasy, mythic fallout, and office satire. Perfect for fans of Good Omens, Rivers of London, and "what if The Umbrella Academy had to fill out risk assessments."

Contains: British wit, queer vibes, eldritch admin, found-family edges, a haunted vending machine, and one very tired HR (sorry -- DR: Divine Resources).

Coming soon: Those Old Gods - JUNO, where the chaos grows teeth and the paperwork bites back. (Yes, I'll be narrating that one too. You're welcome, or I'm sorry. We'll find out together.) Preview of Chapter One Included.

Content Notes: Mild language, peril/horror imagery, gallows humour, off-page intimacy mentions, queer themes, found-family dynamics, no graphic violence or explicit sex.

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Additional Info

  • Publication Date: November 5, 2025
  • Text-to-Speech: Disabled
  • Lending: Disabled
  • Print Length: 193 Pages
  • File Size: 46 KB

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